Joy Carols Spiritual Blog

GREAT NEWS: I am thrilled to tell you that Nine Lives of Joy has been published and is available on Amazon.com for $6.95. And the book has received superb reviews.

During this time of the COVID-19 pandemic, when the world seemed submerged in confusion, fear, uncertainty, I began to look back at my own life. I discovered that each experience revealed to me a new perspective, gratitude for those who shepherded me through, and the realization that I truly love life. And so, I wrote Nine Lives of Joy. A Journey of a Life.

Dr. Cari Jackson, Author of Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt has said in her review of the book: “Joy shares her stories with readers and audiences, not focused on her, but on how they can live their own lives in gratitude, wisdom, humor, strength, wonder, and joy. This is a must-read book for everyone who wants to not just survive – but thrive!”

Nina Frost (Soul Mapping): “In this time of global challenge, Joy Carol has given us a most personal and yet universally applicable book in this beautiful, grateful, inspiring memoir. How to persevere in the face of multiple challenges? In sharing her own journey so compellingly, Joy shows us all how to co-create with whatever life hands us.”

Barbara Hamilton-Holway (Who Will Remember Me) wrote: “We all need healing in mind, body, and spirit, personally and collectively. Joy’s story will invite you into your own healing process and inspire you in preparing for life. Joy’s nine lives hearten our desire to face hardships and to live and love life.”

My colleague and friend Katie Sanborn-Price wrote this description of the book: “The book didn’t really say much about Joy’s close encounters with death. Death was almost a footnote at the end of each story: ‘And then I almost died – but didn’t.’ Slowly it dawned on me. The title is Nine Lives of Joy. Death is not the point.

“As Joy’s life unrolls, I began to see the magic tapestry of strength, empathy, and humor that she has woven. Her dedication to educating and empowering others coupled with her thirst for adventure do not allow for the possibility of giving in to injury or illness. If anything, each event only causes her to look deeper into herself and further her commitment to her life and her work.

“Like riding the largest roller coaster in the world, Joy’s story is both terrifying and exhilarating. Her fierce spirit and passion for life have allowed her to defy death on eight occasions. An extraordinary tale for extraordinary times, we hope it inspires and lifts those who brave the journey of the Nine Lives of Joy.”

What a privilege and pleasure to write this book. Like a fabulous treasure.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com  

As I write this blog, the world is still in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic. We feel submerged in loss, confusion, fear, uncertainty. Almost every country in the world has suffered from this pandemic. Very few who are alive today have ever faced a global catastrophe of this magnitude.

As often happens during a time of anxiety and uncertainty, we may feel the need to look back, to recall the “good old times” that took place earlier in our lives, to feel nostalgia about what we had before. Through every human crisis since time began, people have always found a way through the dark times and into the light. I believe that we will emerge from this too with wisdom, compassion, creativity, and a will to live. 

As I began to look back at my own life, I realized that I have personally lived through eight close encounters with death. There is a saying that “cats have nine lives.” It seems that through some quirk of the grand design, I was granted the same amount. Each experience revealed to me a new perspective, gratitude for those who shepherded me through, and the realization that I truly love life. And so, I have been writing my next book Nine Lives of Joy. My colleague and friend Kattie Sanborn-Price is helping me with it. She just wrote this description of the book:

“The book didn’t really say much about Joy’s encounters with death. Death was almost a footnote at the end of each story: ‘And then I almost died – but didn’t.’ Slowly it dawned on me. The title is Nine Lives of Joy. Death is not the point. 

“As Joy’s life unrolls, I began to see the magic tapestry of strength, empathy, and humor that she has woven. Her dedication to educating and empowering others coupled with her thirst for adventure do not allow for the possibility of giving in to injury or illness. If anything, each event only causes her to look deeper into herself and further her commitment to her life and her work. To Joy, her work is like breathing. 

“Like riding the largest roller coaster in the world, Joy’s story is both terrifying and exhilarating. Her fierce spirit and passion for life have allowed her to defy death on eight occasions. An extraordinary tale for extraordinary times, we hope it inspires and lifts those who brave the journey of the Nine Lives of Joy.”

So, Katie’s introduction is to give you a heads up that my new book will soon be published. I’ll let you know when it is. It has been a great privilege and pleasure to write. Like a fabulous gift.

* What are your special memories that you want to cherish and hold close to your heart?

* What are the dreams that you want to follow and be open to?

Thank you, God, for creating this awesome world. May we be appreciative of the gift of life – however we may experience it. And during these times of fear and confusion, may we look back at our lives and learn to be thankful for all of life and then to be open to whatever lies ahead. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com  

As I write this, we are in the grip of the COVID-19 Virus pandemic.  Surrounded by fear, loss, illness, death, and confusion, the world is on pause; stopped dead in its tracks by an invisible stranger. Very few who are alive today have ever faced a global catastrophe of this magnitude.

As often happens during a time of anxiety and uncertainty, we may feel the need to look back, to recall the “good old times” that took place earlier in our lives. One of my glorious memories that I deeply relish is that of my much-loved outdoor shower at my beach house in Hampton Bays. After gardening in the warm sun or walking on the beach, it always felt refreshing and rejuvenating to get into my outdoor shower with the sky and the branches of a huge oak tree as the only roof over my head.

One year, I planted a honeysuckle vine beside the wooden structure surrounding the shower, and the vines climbed all over it. Among the sweetly fragrant flowers hanging inside the shower was a little ceramic plaque with the words “Find Beauty in All Things” right next to a small ornamental mirror. When I moved to my home in Florida, I brought the little plaque “Find Beauty in All Things” and hung it along with other signs from my former outdoor shower – right next to the mirror in the bathroom. Having a mirror next to that plaque was a strong reminder that it’s important to look for our own deep, internal beauty.

Yes, it is valuable to look for beauty in all things which God has created. It’s so easy to see the ugly side of life and to find fault with people, things, even life itself – especially during a time of a frightening pandemic. And beauty is there. After all, we have been created by the master artist – our God.

* Are there places and people where you can easily see beauty in life?

* Are there times when it’s difficult for you to see beauty anywhere?

Thank you, God, for being the great artist and for creating a world full of beauty. Teach us to be attentive observers and protectors of your amazingly beautiful world. And during these times of fear and confusion, help us to look for beauty in all things, all peoples, and in ourselves. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com 

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it. – John 1:5

During the “darkness of Lent” in the middle of the COVID-19 Pandemic, we have felt a deep uneasiness and fear that life was out of control. We longed to experience a sense of hope and a return of light.

The Passion story of Jesus’ last week is heartrending: he was mocked, humiliated, painfully nailed to a cross, and died. Yet, much to the surprise and disbelief of his disciples, the soldiers, and the Pharisees, on the third day, he rose up from the tomb and left it empty. The story gives us much hope that we too can rise above our fears, our suffering, our pessimism, our sorrows. Perhaps we too can create and live a new and more meaningful life – even in the crazy world of being “locked up” because of the COVID-19 Pandemic.

In the Gospel of John these words are written, “What has come into being was life, and the life was the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.” Hopefully, the darkness has not overcome us, and with the light of Easter, we will feel more nourished and inspired.

The Season of Lent is behind us, and the virtual shouts of Easter “Alleluias!” will begin to fade from our minds. We trust, however, that our hearts have been touched and our souls cleansed a bit during this Lenten Season. Perhaps we feel somewhat changed. Hopefully we have memories of a moment when we “got it” or were surprised to find a tear in our eye. Maybe we were given some inspiration or spiritual energy that will help us move our world in new directions. We must hang on to these positive memories in order to fight the negative thoughts and fears that can creep into our minds.

Yes, now is the time to believe in empty tombs, to trust that hope is around the corner, and to begin to pursue new life-giving activities. Let’s take our everyday lives and practice special acts of love (even from a distance) each and every day. And may we look for “the light” all the days of our lives.  

·         Consider how you can nourish and re-kindle your faith and your dreams.

·         Ponder how you can keep away negative, pessimistic thoughts from your mind.

Beloved God, thank you for bringing the light back to our lives and into our frightened minds. Inspire us to open our hearts to the positive, to new life, to service – even when we are distanced from one another. May we open our hearts to fresh possibilities, transformed living. In the name of God, we pray. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com

The very least you can do in your life is figure out what you hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope. Not admire it from a distance but live right in it.   – Barbara Kingsolver

The news these days has not been good. There is so much fear and suffering all around the world. The Corona Virus, signs of destructive climate change, war. We may feel overwhelmed and frightened at our own powerlessness to help.

It’s at times like this that I like to turn to what people who have faced tremendous difficulties have said about life while hanging on to shreds of hope – like Nelson Mandela: “I am fundamentally an optimist. Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun, one’s feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lays defeat and death.” Or the words of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, who lost his country, his people: “No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful an experience is, if we lose our hope, that’s our real disaster.”

Yes, I agree with these dynamic people who inspire us. We need to be hopeful even in bad times. We know that human history is not only about suffering and cruelty, but it’s also filled with compassion, sacrifice, kindness. What we choose to emphasize in these confusing days will determine how we live. If we see only the worst, our ability to do something will be damaged. We need to remember those times and places where people have behaved wonderfully. This will give us the boost to take action. Or as Howard Zinn once wrote, “Hope will at least give us the possibility of sending this spinning top of a world in a different direction.”

In my own little world of wrestling with my Paraneoplastic Syndrome, cancer, and my inability to walk without assistance, hope is something I have learned to hang onto and to put daily into perspective. I have to remember that I live in a country with top of the line medicine, with awesome hospitals – like the amazing Mayo Clinic that has saved my life, and compassionate doctors who never gave up on me and who fought for me. Yes, I know that hope can spring forth even in suffering, loss, and fear.

So I agree with Robert Fulghum, who wrote: “I believe that hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is a cure for grief.” And I love Emily Dickinson’s words: “Hope is the thing with feathers / That perches in the soul / And sings the tune without the words / And never stops at all.” I hope you will read that last line several times!!

• Are there things that you can focus on that are hopeful for you, that can change your perspective?
• Are there issues and losses that make you feel that hope has left your heart and soul?

Beloved Creator of Hope, sometimes we come to You feeling hopeless, afraid, thinking that we or the world are really in bad shape. But maybe it isn’t as bad as we think. Maybe it will work out. Perhaps we don’t need to worry. If only we put our trust in You, and move forward with faith and hope and confidence in the future. Then hope will never stop. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com

Be the change that you wish to see in the world.    — Mahatma Gandhi

Usually in the fall of the year, I am aware that the days are getting shorter and cooler, and I sense that autumn is in the air. Here in Florida, the change is more subtle and less dramatic. Still, when I think about the seasons changing, I believe it’s a good time to reflect on the many changes in life.

Although we may not always like it, change is a part of being alive, of living. Change can occur in our physical or spiritual lives, our relationships, our financial situation. Because we live in a fast-moving world, it can be a bit frightening. It can make us feel out of control, even anxious.

Sometimes we forget that even as life rushes by, we have the ability to choose how we will respond to that. We need to remember it is possible to experience gifts of peace and calm even in the midst of chaos and confusion.

Sometimes during a time of transition, a bit of clarity shines through and opens our eyes to how vulnerable we are or how precious life is to us. We may see that we haven’t been very careful about what we have chosen to do with our precious days on earth, that our living has become careless. We might not give thought to what we hold as sacred. Indeed, life is brief. It’s sobering to think there isn’t endless time left for us to live. It can make us want to use our time well. If we lived our life as if we had only one day left to live, the sense of impermanence might heighten a feeling of preciousness.

Change can also provide new opportunities for growth. Perhaps we can affirm that we are changing, we are growing, we are learners, we are filled with potential. And we can gather wisdom from our life experiences in order to live a transformed life.

Yes, we are always in transition, and we have no idea what life will be like in the future. But we can make good choices about change in order to live our lives fully and meaningfully. Even when we feel busy or rushed, it’s important that we stop and reflect, so that we will become aware of the many options open to us.

• What are the changes you are facing in your life?
• What do you want to do with the precious time you have left in life?

Beloved Creator, thank You for creating a world full of surprises and changes. When we face major challenges or are in transition on our journey, help us to learn from our past experiences. May we come to realize that You are always there for us, even during enormous changes in our lives. Amen

— Joy Carol, www.joycarol.com

When the weather is hot, keep a cool mind. When the weather is cold, keep a warm heart.

–Ajahn Brahm

People don’t notice whether it’s winter or summer when they’re happy.

– Anton Chekhov

It’s been very hot here in Northern Florida this year. The temperature hit the 100s last weekend and it’s only the first days of June. It appears that we’re breaking the heat records. Yes, summer has come racing into our lives. People barely seem to be moving as the heat blasts off buildings and up from concrete sidewalks. Air conditioners roar away.

Unfortunately, the blazing sun dries up flowers, plants, grass, ponds, lakes, even trees. Before long, one hears a lot of people complaining that it’s too hot, that it’s too early to have this kind of weather. They hope the skies will open, and there will be a major rainstorm.

But if we could just pause and stop feeling sorry for ourselves, we would realize that in many places around the world, there isn’t any air conditioning – not even fans to help people cool down. People are trying to find a shady spot under a wilting tree, others are sitting on fire escapes and hanging out windows in cities. Everyone hopes to catch a tiny bit of breeze. Sadly, many people get sick; some even die from heat stroke.

If my father were alive, he would remind me that in every event or happening that we face, even in our deepest discomfort, we need to stop and learn something from the situation. But we have to be truly open to doing that. He told me the drought and Dust Bowl of the 1930s taught people a lot of important lessons about conservation, about not wasting water, about helping each other to cope and survive by sharing what little they had.

What about us? Can we learn something from this season of high temperatures? Certainly, we know it’s a time to slow down our fast lives, to walk more slowly, to sit quietly, to meditate on the changes in the climate and to realize what we must do about that. And of course, we need to be more compassionate and caring for those who are less privileged than we are.

This summer, I’m going to try to listen to my father. I will attempt to ponder the heat and what it means to me and to others around the world. I remember Ecclesiastes 3: “To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun. A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted.” Yes, we have so much to ponder and to learn – even from the heat.

* Can you stop complaining about the heat and learn something during the hot weather?

* Can you be more aware of the millions of people who have no way to cool themselves?

Beloved Creator, as we go through these days of heat, help us to learn something. May we take appropriate actions of compassion and kindness to others and to our planet. May we be reminded to slow down, to leave our work behind, to rest and restore our souls. May we feel the heat of Your Presence in our lives. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com

I love places that make you realize how tiny you – and your problems – are.  –Anonymous

At times in our lives, we find places that touch our souls, where we feel at home, where we have a sense of joy and peace. I’ve found what I call my Soul Places in a number of spots around the world – ranging from my own gardens to a special beach to a number of sacred structures including Notre Dame in Paris. When I’m in those places, I feel rooted, peaceful, a sense of belonging and of being “home.” Those places recharge my batteries and hold a spiritual significance for me.

It’s interesting that I felt a connection to Notre Dame long before I ever went to Paris. Perhaps it was my high school French teacher who lived in Paris during the summer and showed us photos of every corner of the City of Light. I even found a book about the history of the lengthy building of Notre Dame, which was in existence since 1180 and completed in 1260. I read every word of that book – knowing implicitly that I was somehow connected to that monumental Cathedral.

So when I started going often to Paris, I would immediately go to the Ile de la Cite, the island in the middle of the Seine River. I couldn’t wait to see the exquisite beauty of the Cathedral of Notre Dame with its intricate carvings representing the history of the church and its tall, breathtaking spire and flying buttresses.

Sadly, the Cathedral caught fire during Holy Week in 2019. The world watched in horror as the orange flames leapt through the roof. It felt unreal. I’m sure many of us wondered how a stone church could burn. And when the beautiful spire fell, I found myself weeping with the people of Paris.

Often when I visited Notre Dame, I walked in the gardens behind the Cathedral – one of the most peaceful places in Paris. I will always remember sitting in the garden and looking up at the buttresses and feeling very small next to them.

I’ve heard people describe Notre Dame as the beating heart of Paris. Inside the church, the air is filled with centuries of prayers, incense, songs, joys, sorrows. On one of my visits I prayed for a dear friend who was suffering from a very aggressive cancer. I could almost feel the Cathedral lifting my prayers to heaven.  

For me, Notre Dame is a Soul Place that feels like it will always be there. Although the spire fell, and the roof burned, Notre Dame still stands. The building is very important to me because it holds many memories for me and for others. It’s probably why Parisians wept and sang near the cathedral, even if they hadn’t set foot in it for years. It’s likely why people around the world, many of whom never worshipped there, started looking at their own memories. Yes, Notre Dame will always be a Soul Place for me. And I believe it stands as a work of praise to God.

* Do you have places that touch your soul?

* Do you think of them often and try to get to them from time to time?

Beloved Soul Maker. Thank you for the gifts of Soul Places in our lives. May we unlock our hearts and minds to them and to their healing touch for us. May we be open to other places that can touch us deeply. Lord, we give You thanks for Your endless gifts of Soul Places in the world. May we be worthy of recognizing and receiving them. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com

When we are stricken and cannot bear our lives, then a tree has something to say to us: Be still! Look at me! Life is not easy, life is not difficult. Home is neither here nor there. Home is within you.   – Herman Hesse

Spring has a way of stimulating us with a sense of newness, a diversion from the old. Usually when something new or different occurs, we think: “Wow! I’m so excited about these new insights, new surroundings, new friends.” Old habits and activities may be replaced with different activities, fresh excitement, new pressures. But the novelty of the new can wear off, and we may find ourselves missing the old and the familiar – a longing ache for what has been well-known to us. At times we may even feel a tad of “homesickness” thinking of the faces of old friends and family and places.

Homesickness can happen to anyone who is away from their familiar life, their old “home.” Over the years we have learned what “homesickness” really is. In the journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, homesickness is defined as “distress and functional impairment caused by an actual or anticipated separation from ‘home’ and family or friends.” Those who suffer from this condition may feel sadness, nervousness, anxiety, and most often an obsessive preoccupation with thoughts of something they think of as “home.”

According to Josh Klapow, a clinical psychologist and associate professor at the University of Alabama, homesickness isn’t necessarily about “home.” Nor is it really an illness. Rather it comes from our natural desire for security, love, and protection – feelings we usually associate with “home.” When these qualities aren’t present in a new environment, we begin to long for them. We’re missing what’s normal, what is regular or habitual for us.

When we feel such a longing, it may help to surround ourselves with some of our favorite things to make us feel more comfortable. Listening to our much-loved music, looking at photos of our family, loved ones, or of places that mean something to us may help us feel less melancholy or sad. We may feel restored by going to a church, a synagogue, a park, or a sacred place to be with the Divine. We might want to establish a routine time for talking with the Divine which can help to fill our day with hope and give us something to look forward to – especially if we feel surrounded by “darkness.” Perhaps then we might discover the feeling of being “home.”

* What is the “darkness” that surrounds you and can make you feel “homesick”?

* What are ways that you can experience “home” in your life?

Great Divine One, we thank you for your patient love for us – even when we are like frightened children who tend to forget how much you love us. Help us when we feel hungry, homesick, yearning for “home.” May we learn to turn to you as our “home” and that indeed we will find “home” with you. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com

A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future,
and accepts you just the way you are.    –Unknown

These last weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships and how important they are to us. Like almost everyone I know, I too have had a number of losses and challenges that have been quite difficult. I recently lost a very dear friend, Gwenn McCormick. He was a very special person in my life, and I will miss his company, wisdom, and kindness.

It’s amazing that at these critical times, friends seem to appear from out of nowhere to help us get through these losses. I’m very grateful to be blessed with supportive friends and family who have been there for me when I’ve really needed them.

In my lifetime, I’ve learned a great deal about true friendships. When we have friends, who are tried and true, we know we can share our failures and our successes, our tears and our laughter. We don’t have to worry if we will be misunderstood or disliked if we appear to be too powerful, too weak, too attractive, too unattractive, too smart, too simple, too successful, too much of a failure, too funny, too serious. Real friends allow each other to be completely themselves, to become the person they are meant to be.

Without a doubt, our genuine friends want the best for us, and they encourage us to pursue our dreams and find fulfillment in life. Over the years I’ve come to realize that quality friendships offer ongoing support, learning experiences, mirrors of truth, and a superb check and balance system. Real friends will tell us positive things if and when we deserve them but also will let us know when things aren’t quite right – when we might be messing up. These relationships can weather all kinds of differences, changes, craziness, and transformations. I believe a really good friend like my friend Gwenn is precious and valuable – a treasure.

For most of us, the company of such friends feels like healing balm; just being in each other’s presence can be enough. Experiencing this kind of caring gives us the courage to try new experiences and stretch our wings. Certainly, a healthy friendship helps us grow in every way. Yes, a true friendship is one of life’s extraordinary gifts. I call it a gift from God.

* Have you thought about who are your true friends that you can trust with your life?

* Have you thanked those friends and told them how much they mean to you?

Beloved Friend, you have given us the gift of Your friendship. And You have also blessed us with friendships here on earth, who help us when we lose a special friend. Help us to be good friends to one another, to ourselves, and to You. What a friend we have in You! Thank you for all these gifts. May we truly cherish them. Amen.

Joy Carol

www.joycarol.com